Being Selfish

Mom always, always, always, say that it will be hard for me to get someone who have values like her husband aka my dad. He is not perfect but for me, yes, it is hard to get a man like him these days.

History is history, I don’t care for the man he used to be but now, I see him much better than other men,young men. Pretty sure most of us think of our dad highly than others, no doubt on that, experience what makes someone better and your dad are amazing too. No hard feelings, okay. I just compare it with young gentlemen.

He don’t mind to do laundry from A to Z on weekend. Sometimes week days.
He loves to cook snack for us in the evening.  He can hear me, his daughter, talk about anything, problems and mom’s related issue (shhhh), and boys and marriage.
He laughs when I fought with my sister about who should clean up our cat’s poop.
He calms my heart when I was about to burst from disagreement with my mom.
He talks me some sense.
He let my mom have her own free time with her friends.

Why bold? Because this is what most young men couldn’t give to her spouse, I guess. We, women tend to lose our friends after each of them getting married, isn’t? Responsibilities here and there.
I am being selfish. I do say in my prayer, let my friends be my friends even when they get married. I wish I can get a man, of course good in religion, and also allows me to have some time-off from house chores and stuff.

I am being selfish to have all for me. To have their time for me. To have both family and friends for me.

I am being selfish.


the face

me: “mom, can you just find me somebody to marry?”
mom: “no way, you smile less, you always look angry”
me: “mom, do you really think i am that bad. dad, deep down in your heart, do you reallllllllyyyy think i am bad as your child?”
dad: “noo but you can be better”
me: “no one is perfect dad, i can cook if i want too and i do cook once in a while. and mom, do i have to smile always like always?” mom: “not really but you always look angry”
me: “no, i’m not. okay. people at office always call me cute because i am intern okay” (even if they are just being sarcastic, i trust their judgement)

so that’s what happen. my parents always say that i have this angry face patch onto me. i can’t smile while walking on the street, alone. people are going to think, “ohh my, she looks fine but crazy”. i don’t want that.

yes, my tone when i speak can sound so serious. of course it is when i talk about serious stuff. because i speak so nice and cute and ‘manja’, mom would say, “you speak like a kid, try to be mature”. seee. so how should i behave exactly.

i accept that i can be lazy, now tell who isn’t? once in a while, we are allowed some lazy time but actually we are not being lazy. even when we are lazy, our focus is actually towards something that doesn’t require lots of effort. for example, watch television, read novel, play with phone, update blog, play games, try new make up and so and so.

in term of finding man that i like. at first i may look crazy-angry like my mom said but frankly speaking i am sweet like candy but in a good way where i won’t give you diabetes or bad teeth.

but i believe my mom and dad are just joking in that whole conversation. right? you guys are joking, right? right?